comparisons are done easily once you've had a taste of perfection

Written on April 08, 2011 at 8:55 PM

8th April 2011
Dancer passed on. :( at 6+
the last i saw her was 4+
she's let go her last breath after seeing my whole family? :3 except my sis. who care bout her. == she don't even care bout dogs.
i can't stop myself from crying today when i saw her. :(
she had breathing difficulty.
the doctor said her organ started failing already.
her kidneys stopped functioning.
her intestines stopped functioning.
now, her lungs stopped too.
i was praying hard that she won't go today, but when i woke up from my nap,
my mum told me she's dead. and i went o...*blank face
i realized i've not got much pictures of her. or maybe i don't even have one.
sigh.. how is this possible? :( maybe i'll try go looking for one later.
it's kinda unfair.. she's still young. God, why take her away? :(

actually yesterday night my parents and my brother discussed about letting her go..
but today morning when my mum n brother went and visit her..
before even go in, the doctor already advised them to just let it go.. since she's suffering. and the disease wont go away. her body isn't reacting to the medicine they gave her.
my brother and my mum cried when they saw her.
just now, i cried too. and i think my dad did teared abit when he saw her. :'(

Written on April 06, 2011 at 6:29 PM

boreddd. feel lyk blogging. lawls.
went and visit Dancer just now.
ytd dad told me that the doctor said her condition kinda bad. :'( kidney malfunctioning.
2day saw her i reli felt lyk crying. T_T i keep tahan. ><
vry cham leh c her laying thr not moving. really feel lyk crying.
while blogging bout her oso feel sad. :(
although i don't really like her, still. she's innocent. i don't want her to die!

anyw, sien naa. i wana learn guitar! :3
i wana own a ukulele. i want a white one! or yellow! or blue or black. :DD

maybe after pmr i'll start back violin. :3 olololo~ sien na. -.-


btw, oh no. piano cls from now onwards extend 30 mins. WTF
so now, my cls is frm 7.30 - 9. :O chisin. i can pengsan i tell you.
today learned grade 6 theory. sounded not bad. wahahaha. not like how i imagined.
maybe later on i'll suffer nia. haiz. D:

k~bye. go do homeworks. T__T busy busy.

Written on April 04, 2011 at 9:25 PM

kayy. i was supposed to blog last week. but i totally forgot. LOL
1st off, congratulations to those who got their post for band.
2nd, life is O-K-A-Y. can cope. but next month is diagnostic. WTF
i feel damn free lo actually. budden i've got loads of things to do. -.-
OH SHIT. i forgot sejarah nota. damn it. nvm la. afta blogging oni do.
you see! fellow readers, i'm concerned about ur needs. *sorry, i crap alot. -.- cant help it.
3rd, it's 4th April which means it's one year anniversary since Mitch passed away.D:
4th, i'm reading alot of books now adays. shit. == i'm finishing them all. -.-
i feel i read more than last year. == it's april and i finished duno hw many books dy. zz
okay. i thinks dats all for last week and today? :DD
and oh no. i didn't kena april fooled. D: sigh. only 1 people tried fooling me and it was ridiculous.LOL

*RANDOM - why guys i noe all oso so annoying 1? == omg. damn. D:

Written on March 25, 2011 at 9:12 PM

just a random update again.
maybe i plan to update every end of the week?lols. see if i'm hardworking enough.
plan to write "essays" about life. lalala~ bt i dont think it'll happen vry often. lols. it goes.

while studying sejarah, i sudd thought of
actually the concept of komunis is good.
everything is equal, no class in the society. how i wish life is like that.
God is kind of unfair. D:
some people work their heads off just to earn some money when some other people just sits thr and all the money comes in. it kinda sucks thinking bout it.
some people gets all the smartness and some people study and study to cope.
why can't life be more fair?

i hate my life. people might think it's better than theirs. but i think it's not very much better only. it's just that i choose not to show my depression. but, i'm starting to shut people off.
i can feel myself retreating. i realized i treat some people coldly. i cant help it. :/
one thing i hate about myself is, i kept saying what's good what's bad. but ended up, i actually does it too. i judge people, but at the end of the day, i reflect it to myself and i find myself not too much better than them.

sometimes, i think i'm actually faking my happiness.
people seem to don't notice it. it's because i'm actually happy that time or my acting is that good? i, myself cant differentiate it too. maybe it's those happiness that doesn't last long. i don't know.
i can feel empty-ness in myself though. sometimes i'm smiling but i feel depression inside too.

haizzz.........kla, lazy want write. ==
bye, blogggg. :)

Written on March 06, 2011 at 12:27 AM

a random update. since i've nvr updated u for kinda a long time. :)
2011 = hectic. busy. stress. wth?=.="
y so many things is happening in dis year geh?-w-
band concerts, weddings, examinations.. omg. ==
june is gonna b tiringgg. :3
i cant wait for march holi. i wonder wats gonna happen at band. hmph~
dat's enough for now. MUAHAHAHAHA

peace out. Y

-i seek attention from people. but allas, i hate being too close to them.

Written on December 19, 2010 at 11:52 PM

bac frm popo's hse. :D
tired. :)
over night at her hse ytd.
ecx performed!!<3<3 suka suka~~ ngehehe.
chit chat, pillow fight, playing at night. :D
till 5am for me. :) den start 2 tired ler. slp~:)
me and mctt slpt at 5. woke at 2.30pm.
d other 3, popo, yt n ann ann slpt at 10am. @@ crazy.
den slp till 2.30+ oso. XD crazy~~~~~~~~~
*pengsan. hw cn dey slp so late?
i broke my record. XD slpt at 5 n woke at 2.30. MUAHAHAHA.
fun fun fun~den wake up ler, bath. talk talk.
makan "lunch". den go artisha's hse. :D
happy. DRUM!!!! muahahaha.
i still suck at it. -.- bt i cn play diff beats liao. MUAHAHA
*proud* happy! muahaha.
hw i wish i gt a drumset. nt 2 mean i wana learn lar. juz wana suka suka den play~:P
i wan a music room!sound prove. :P piano dalam!:D

haiz. sien. ololololo~~~~
i srsly dont noe y. i wana noe bout ppl's stuff.
bt dey tell me ler, i regret knowing. ><
cuz i'll b speechless. :X damn. *slaps self. y i so patt gehh. damnnn.

Written on December 16, 2010 at 9:30 PM

hmph, back again for more talking. :)
sis's chinese birthday. 1 word. SIEN.
next week's wednesday is her birthday! WEEEE!!!

next week is gonna be a good good week!:D
band practice. malas. ><
sis's bday. n 'gor tong' i forgot wats dat in english. lunar calender thingy?duno.
on thursday going jb! next day heading 2 SINGAPORE!!:D:D
den meet up wif hyde. i think? n oh yeah. jln jln~~watch movie?
okay, who in dis world goes for a movie during his/her vacation?>< ME
bt, who cares. :P as long as i enjoy. wahaha.
den count down!:D with hyde? hahahaha. i wonder hws it gonna b~~ *excited*

afta dat, back 2 d boring days.
school reopening. :(
is it juz me or is it for real?
this year's holiday is shorter den wat i thought.
or mayb vacations made it shorter. :P

sigh, i havent go buy book.
havent get my DAMN BLOODY TEXT BOOKS. >:(
need 2 buy new badges again, I THINK?
i srsly dont noe whrs my pope hse badge!><
mayb it's in my cupboard or in some basket?
srsly forgot. =.= dont tell me i nid 2 buy it again. grrr.
every year oso buy new 1. ><
i wan new pinafore. :( bt i dont think will get. oh well~

hmphh, i guessed i didn't keep 2 my own promise?
damn. thanks 2 adrian. >:(
i'm talking 2 him again. is it bad or good? sigh.

n ooohh!by watching korean dramas, i've learnt quite a few korean words. :P
currently watching beethoven virus!
gosh, so many lengzais~:P
wahahahahaha. n many more~ NGEHEHE.
*bangs head on d wall. watching too much of dramas. @@

wookay, thats all for today. :)

Written on December 13, 2010 at 9:48 PM

dear bloggie bloggie. XD
long time i didn't come n rant bout my life.
i shall rant some today. ;)
okayy, this is supposed 2 be depressing.
but, thanks to KOH JIA YEE. <3>i'm gonna get you out of my life!:D
no more replying u. and answering ur calls. BYE!!BYE!!

sighs, tml gt violin. afta duno hw many weeks. =3
longtime no practice. hold d bow for awhile oso pain liao. :(
hw am i gonna survive 1 hr tml?@@~
summore nid 2 wake up early. violin at 9.30. damnn.
so earlyy. bt good thing oso. i'm gonna b free in d aftanoon.
ahaha, can watch CSI. :P
i'm currently addicted to csi. :D
it's interesting. :D solving case, autopsy. ahahaha. :)
dats all for d day. ;)
n oh yeah, went shopping wif mami,ann,ting n somebody which i dont noe d name. ohh, i know!!! it's ANODE! :P
bought 2 blouse. :D 1 yellow checkered n 1 white black lines. :)
happy~~~:D purposely bought d yellow checkered for SOUL KRAZY!
wonder who's gonna win d battle ground 2010?
sk?dynamix?floor fever?max identity? wonder who will win. ><
anyway, dats all for today!

Written on December 06, 2010 at 2:40 PM

annoying much. why does old peoples must be so bloody annoying?
damn you. == answer d phone oso cant answer properly. WTF!
i answered d call n u bloody yell at me. whats you damn problem?
and YOU. you go telling other people bout us. talking on our back.
saying bad stuffs bout my mother. back stabbing everybody.
yelling at my dogs. my maid. FUCK YOU OLD BITCH.
acting as a pity old women. FUCK YOU.
why cant you die faster?=.= bitch.bitch.bitch. back stabbing people!
you make havoc at my hse. idiot. you know how much TROUBLE you cost?
and do you know how bloody much your welfare cost?
hire maid, buy this buy that. and WHO PAY FOR IT?!
MY MOTHER. BITCH, be thankful!== stop back stabbing my mother, idiot.
telling people my mother dont care bout you, hates you. damn you la.
d reason people hates you is your bloody damn attitude!!!!
acting pityful infront of people. back stabbing people. idiot.idiot.idiot.
dont know how to be thankful. always saying how good your daughter is.
she dont even really care bout you. MY MOTHER TREATS YOU BETTER THAN YOUR DAUGHTER LA COME ON. think properly. use your bloody brain n think.
and always blaming people, yelling at people. you know how annoying is that?!
bising saje, people watching tv den u at there screaming like duno what. ANNOYING LA!!!!!=w=

Written on at 12:37 AM

hmph, in order to keep dis blog alive, it's time for an update. :)
hmph, past few days ntg much actually happened.
juz go through my life la har. :)

on saturday, went to FRIM!:D
supposedly need to joggg. bt ended up walking.
n half the time it was raining. pigg. :P
went 2 d water fall. d water was icy cold!:D
had fun thr. afta dat we went 2 d so called play ground.
awesome!i love d tiang thing. :P
soon afta dat, rain started 2 drop. we ran 2 d slide thr whr dey hav shades. :P
waited thr till d rain isnt dat heavy.
den we planned 2 walk 2 my hse.
i thought i would b near. bt ended up walking for hours ==
i didn't noe my hse is lyk sooo far frm frim!><><><><><

hmph, pmr is getting closer day by day. :(
mr saravanan keep tell us thrs approximately 90+ more days for us to prepare. ><
i need to study!!!!><><
bt sad case, i havent even get my form3 txt buks. == dumb.

oh oh, bought a new story book for myself!:D
the title is EAT,PRAY,LOVE by elizabeth gilbert. :) i always wanted dat book. XD
next is numbers by i dont noe who. :P and sweet little lies by Lauren Conrad

why guys always haunt me?
why all the guys i know is not the type i wished for?==
dumb. bloody hell punya guys. always teasing ppl. wtf?
cant dey think bout ppl's feelings?cant dey be considerate?damn you.==
and why muz guys all b rude?-.-
stop scolding ppl n stop using bad words can you?grr.